In September 2010, Hal traveled down to Eugene with a mutual friend to meet Chelsea for dinner. LIttle did we know or anticipate that meeting would pretty much bring love at first sight and initiate the beginning our story.
In August 2011, family and friends gathered together to celebrate with us as we joined our hearts in marriage. We really had no idea at that time and place in our lives the story that would unfold, and the truth that our "in sickness and in health" vows would bring so early in our marriage.
For the next five years, we moved several places, enjoyed the ups and downs of being newlyweds, faced Hal's Type 1 diabetes diagnosis, celebrated each other's accomplishments of Master's degrees and careers, and prayed the Lord would find us fit to be parents.
In late Fall/early Winter 2016, we had just settled into a beyond busy normal of working our dream jobs (geotechnical engineer for Hal and kindergarten teacher for Chelsea), spearheading a college group ministry at our church and loving where God had us, when Hal became sick. It was a process to discover what the root of his sickness was, starting with diabetes complications, moving towards ulcers, and then finally revealing stomach cancer. He was diagnosed with stage two stomach cancer in March 2017.
We were thrown for a loop and not sure what God was doing. Why did this have to happen to us, and why now? This isn't supposed to happen until we have been married well beyond 30 years and already raised a family. While we didn't understand, we had to move forward trusting Christ, because there was no way to come through this without that trust. We were so thankful for his medical team in Spokane. They acted hard and fast. Hal endured 3 months of 24/7 chemotherapy. It ravaged his body. However, we pressed on knowing that the final result would be cancer free. After chemo, Hal endured a 5 hour surgery where the surgeon removed the tumor along with 2/3 of his stomach and 57 lymph nodes. She was confident after surgery that she had gotten the cancer. Now to just wait for the pathology results to confirm what she believed to be true. Those ten days in the hospital were difficult, but they were also full of relief. We believed in our hearts that Hal was cancer free and looked forward to just a little more chemo and then we could move on with life.
Well, let's just say, God had other plans. About a week after getting home from the hospital, the pathology results were in and it was not good. Hal's cancer was far more extensive than the doctors thought or hoped. 37 out of the 57 lymph nodes were cancerous and the margin of where his stomach was removed from his abdominal lining showed positive for cancer cells. The news hit us like a ton of bricks - no longer could the doctors say Hal would be cured from cancer and his cancer was restaged at 3B. 3B... about one inch shy of stage 4. Again, our hearts broke and we couldn't understand. But God had been too faithful. He still has this in control and we would trust Him to handle this for us.
At this point, after seeking counsel from family, we decided to move back to the Portland area in order to go to OHSU and be close to family. The doctors at OHSU were hopeful more chemo would be able to encapsulate this cancer, so Hal underwent three more months of intense chemotherapy. Not as intense as Spokane, but his body seemed to remember what chemo felt like and reverted back to the nasty side effects. However, he was having clean scans. From September to April, all of Hal's scans came back free of cancer. Praise the Lord, we could breathe a little, focus on Hal regaining strength and getting back to a "norm" again. Chelsea started subbing again and working at a local coffee shop. Things looked as if we might survive this and get through to the other side.
Then in April 2018, the doctor found some mysterious fluid that turned out to be cancerous. Devastation strikes again. But the doctors gave us hope because it turns out Hal's cancer had a specific gene mutation that was compatible with immunotherapy - a type of therapy that bolsters the immune system to attack the cancer cells and not the healthy parts of the body. Not only was it compatible, but his tumor that was removed in Spokane responded to the immunotherapy when it was sampled! We were sold and went forward with hope believing this was going to work. The first treatment went well, very well. Hal did great, there were no side effects, and we couldn't wait to continue. Then the second cycle came and his immune system went into hyperdrive - essentially killing his thyroid function and bringing on a severe colitis that kept Hal homebound. With a combination of these side effects, Hal's health started to decline again. As hard as we tried, nothing was stopping the side effects from overcoming his body. After forgoing two more treatments, the doctor did a CT scan only to find more abdominal fluid than when he started immunotherapy. What? This is not what was supposed to happen. Wasn't the immunotherapy supposed to decrease the fluid? The doctor gave us hope that it could just be related to the colitis, so he gave Hal three weeks with medication to try to decrease the inflammation and then had another CT scan.
However, this time the CT scan showed results we were not praying for or expecting to hear, not only was the fluid there, but the CT scan showed abnormalities in the stomach and colon consistent with his cancer. His cancer had returned, this time with a vengeance. We were slapped across the head with reality of what we were hearing: cancer in stomach and colon, not responding to any treatments, too sick to try anything else, it's time to bring in hospice. Crushed, confused and heartbroken were the only things to come to mind.
Words are hard to come by in these moments, but this is where our journey is currently. We have met our hospice team and our goal and prayer is for Hal to have some quality days where we can enjoy some fishing or go to the beach or even something as simple as going on a coffee date where we can sit and enjoy each other's company. We are cherishing every moment we have with each other and with family and wrapping each other in love as much as we can.
So this is our story. It's a messy story. A story that we have often asked God if He wouldn't mind rewriting for us. Yet, He has chosen this path for us and we have to believe that He will redeem this story. The last two years have shown us so many ups and downs that it is hard to comprehend; however, in the midst of the chaos, Christ has consistently shown His faithfulness. He does so in small ways that remind us that we are still in the palm of His hand and He is not letting go.
Our desire, dear Reader, in sharing our story with you, is that you would see a better glimpse into who God is - a faithful God, who is still there holding you - even when you are asked to endure an unthinkable trial. He has been faithful in physical ways (providing finances or the right medical team at exactly the right time) as well as in spiritual ways (placing the right Word in front of us at just the right time, showing us a podcast of a fellow sufferer who has remained under a trial and come through it, or allowed us the chance to meet someone who needed encouragement or encouraged us).
Job has played an important role in our journey, as Hal has often related to his story. We have clung to the promise that is shared in Job 23:10 and hope you may find encouragement as well, "But He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I shall come out as gold."
